It was the best of trees.

It was the worst of trees.

It was a tree of wisdom.

It was a tree of foolishness.

It was a tree of light.

It was a tree of darkness.

It was a tree of hope.

It was a tree of despair.

[Apologies to Charles Dickens for bastardizing “A Tale of Two Cities.”]

I was raised in a family where artificial Christmas trees were not a consideration. Each year, a “live tree” was brought into our house. [The irony of that term is not lost.] The scent of the tree quickly filled our tiny house. But it was much more than that. The tree elevated not just our sense of smell, but it brought joy, love and light to our other senses as well. Glorious Christmas was near. And at Christmas, anything was possible!

My 4 siblings and I would impatiently wait while my dad put the tree in the stand and then hung lights on it. Now, these lights were not the small, cheap, “Made in China” lights intended to last one year and then be thrown away. Oh no. They were large, colorful bulbs. Bulbs that would get hot ensuring that they would not stay on overnight. Bulbs to singe little fingers. You know, fire hazard bulbs.

That first glorious night, we would hang ornaments, both store bought and homemade on the tree. Being the 1960s, tinsel icicles would be the last items placed on the tree as mom constantly yelled out, “One at a time! Just hang one at a time!”

Nighttime was the best. The rest of the lights in the room turned off, the glow of the star on top of the tree, the bulbs smoldering on its branches, maybe Mitch Miller’s “Sing Along with Mitch Christmas Songs” album being played on the Magnavox. And all was right with the world.

As the years passed and the dreams and fantasies of childhood were left behind, our adult years came upon us. But still, the Christmas tree was eternal. It had to be real. It remained my symbol representing the endless possibilities of greater futures.

Little strangers a/k/a children came into our life. With ever growing numbers of friends and their Little Strangers, we would pile into first our cars, then onto full sized buses, and travel to Christmas tree farms to saw down our very own trees. The look of absolute wonder on our children’s faces were a time portal allowing us small glimpses into our past childhood. And for brief moments in time, we remembered.

Then, the ravages of time took its toll … work, divorce, misplaced priorities … all life lessons teaching us that life is not easy. And it is not meant to be.

And yet, the Christmas tree remained. Decorating the tree became “a thing” for Morgan and me. Each year we strung popcorn and cranberry strands. Even as her eating disorder began to ravage her bodily organs and take her away, the tree remained our last vestige of a childhood that was gone … for both of us.

And then, she was gone.

That first year, less than 2 months after Morgan was taken was gut wrenching. As for a Christmas tree? Forget it! Why go through that pain? But sometimes decisions are removed from your control. Surrounded by pushy siblings, nieces and nephews, a tree found its way into my place … and remained in my life. I still recall the hours which elapsed, tears on my face, looking at the tree. And questioning life.

For the first time, I felt that a Christmas tree was seemingly mocking me. What did I have to be thankful for, or hopeful about? And yet, the tree remained, calling me, trying to get me to remember … to not give up all hope.

A few years went by. And each year, a tree would go up. Now, make no mistake, a “live tree” is not easy. You must work it into the stand, tighten the screws, level it, remember to pour water into it, trim it. It drops needles. It is dirty and messy… and worth every second and every adversity. It helps you … feel. It helps you remember that there are far greater things than your own existence.

A few years ago, on the day I was going to pick up a young lady who was being checked into ERC the next day, just 2 hours before her flight arrived, the Christmas tree fell. Ornaments I deemed precious, shattered. I ranted about how it was NOT a Christmas tree, but it surely must be “Satan’s Shrub.” And then, a valuable life lesson was brought manifest. The only ornaments which broke were those purchased at stores. The precious ones hand made by my children… all survived. Precious memories. A truer message of Christmas, of love, of our children was brought to me.

This year’s version of the Christmas tree was … alarming. Not because of the work that went into it, but because of the incredible ease every step of the way.

We went to the local tree lot (Lowe’s), walked in and the very first tree we saw, was “it.” No bad side which would need to face the wall. Perfect height. It was full. It was perfect. We got it on top of the car with no issues. Brought it home. The stand fit it perfectly the first time. This tree stood tall and straight. After cutting off the netting, the branches settled into perfect harmony. I put on the lights with no issues at all. Ornaments adorned the tree. And then, I found a perfect “tree topper.” A beautiful, Victorian looking angel. Naturally, it fit precisely.

All was right with the world. Or so I thought.

The next morning when I went to check how much water the tree had taken in, I was surprised to see the stand still full of water. Although a bit concerned, I looked upon this as a temporary, small issue. After all, this was the perfect Christmas tree. But, as days went by and the only water leaving the stand was through evaporation, I felt the “perfect Christmas tree” drying out. And quickly at that. It remained presentable for a family and friend’s party.  But its days were quickly over. The “perfect Christmas tree,” the easiest one I had ever had, was anything but perfect.

With still almost two weeks before Christmas, this now fire hazard had to go. And so, it did.

But Christmas is before us. And to not have a tree on that sacred day was unthinkable. So … hi ho, hi ho, it’s back to the lot I go.

Not surprisingly, the only trees left were those that would have made Charlie Brown proud. I was standing on the island of misfit trees. Some beginning to brown on the edges. It was raining of course. I was the only customer there. I grabbed the least sad tree that I could find. A tree I normally would not have even considered for one second. As a last resort it had to be relatively acceptable even though scrawny. And so, this unwanted, red headed stepchild of a Christmas tree found its way home.

It is the smallest tree I have had in years. I put the lights on. Because of its size, far fewer than normal. Then the ornaments. Again, far fewer. The tree’s diminutive size would simply not allow it. And yet, somewhere along the way, just as it happened in a Charlie Brown Christmas, the tree began to transform.

Memories of Christmas tree farms, of the sweet innocence of children, the shouts of joy, the pure laughter from these soulful, little strangers, the sharing of the almost sacred ritual of decorating the tree with my daughter rose to the surface. Its scent was pure … and sublime.

And once again, another valuable lesson manifested. The Christmas tree which I had held so dear for all of these decades, was indeed merely a symbol, important yes, but just a symbol. Most importantly, it was the love surrounding the tree. The shared dear, precious time spent with loved ones. Spending time together.

This scrawny, Charlie Brown tree, overlooked by many, reminded me of the most precious times in which love, pure love, a love a parent has for his child embraces us. It is there to be held. To be cherished.

Fate, karma, or perhaps a little hand from beyond bestowed that gift upon me. Reminders of past feelings, of love, of a bond that even death cannot break. Those thoughts, those feelings came to me as I put the last few ornaments on.

I remembered. I felt that love. Tears on my face. And a Little One no longer here reminding me, of filling my heart.

What a Christmas gift.

As for the tree …

“Explain it to me like I’m a 6-year-old, because I just don’t get it …”

            Jury Foreman, the movie “Philadelphia”

We attorneys are frequently guilty of using overly prosaic words and legalese designed to confuse even Robert Oppenheimer or Albert Einstein. Perhaps it is a defense mechanism. Or ego. Or both.

Many people have heard of the recent lawsuit filed against iaedp and Ms. Bonnie Harken. Make no mistake, it is a very complex lawsuit involving class action allegations, antitrust allegations and racketeering allegations. Even younger, relatively inexperienced attorneys may have difficulty understanding the nuances of the lawsuit. So, I will endeavor to attempt to explain the lawsuit only with regard to certification.

First, it was only after all attempts to discuss and hopefully resolve troubling issues with iaedp were rebuffed by Ms. Harken that the lawsuit was filed.

The decision was not made easily. The terms offered to iaedp were designed to improve the corporate chapters, to increase their involvement and to take iaedp into the following decades with wisdom and vision. The only absolute required Ms. Harken to resign.

Ms. Harken chose to not respond.

And so, that left no alternative.

Defendants

The named defendants in the case are Bonnie Harken, her son, Matthew Harken, iaedp Foundation, Inc., Dena Cabrera, Ralph Carson and Joel Jahraus.

Ms. Cabrera, and Drs. Carson and Jahraus are not involved in the allegations and issues regarding certification so their involvement in the lawsuit will not be addressed in this article.

And so, that leads us to the specific claims made regarding certification.

Claims regarding Certification

FIRST, UNDERSTAND THAT WE ARE NOT ATTACKING THE SUBSTANCE OF IAEDP CERTIFICATION.  Nor do we want it to go away. That is beyond what this lawsuit is about.

Claims involving certification are based on the fact that certification is tied into mandatory membership in iaedp and attendance at 1 out of every 4 symposiums is required. Because iaedp certification is the only recognized eating disorder certification, we believe tying it to on-going membership and attending a symposium violates anti-trust laws.

Since membership fees and symposium fees are not reasonably related nor an integral part of iaedp certification, the mandatory inclusion of same is merely to increase the coffers of iaedp and enrichen its managing director.

iaedp has exclusive market power, a 100% monopoly, in the eating disorder Board Certification Market, as there are no substitutes for eating disorder board certification available to eating disorder specialists.

By conditioning iaedp certification on continuous membership in iaedp and the cost of iaedp’s annual membership dues, as well as mandatory in person attendance at a symposium, we believe iaedp violated the antitrust laws.

As recently as 2022,Ms. Harken had actual knowledge that this tying arrangement may run afoul of antitrust laws.   Ms. Harken had actual knowledge of the case, Talone, et. al. v. The American Osteopathic Association, Case No. 1:16-cv-04644 (D. N.J. Jun. 12, 2017) and the issues involving unlawfully tying association membership with board certification. However, Ms. Harken dismissed any concerns by attempting to justify that since the costs for association membership and certification had allegedly not increased, she could link the two.

It is interesting that in the December 5, 2023 iaedp newsletter, iaedp spends a considerable amount of time discussing the substance of certification. However, not once does iaedp address the tying arrangement aspect nor the fact that Ms. Harken had actual knowledge of a lawsuit in which a similar tying arrangement resulted in a settlement in which that certification was stripped from the organization and members were entitled to reimbursement for fees paid.

And we can’t help but wonder why? Why was this information not given to iaedp members?

Iaedp and Ms. Harken were correct in stating “allegations do not constitute facts.” Those facts will come out in Court. But, as therapists, as medical and mental health providers, you are burdened with an awful, a difficult, a herculean task. And that is, families are relying on you to try to help them save the lives of their loved ones.  Is there a bigger burden?

You deserve all relevant and material information to help you undertake this burden. Anything else and you are being betrayed.

The other issues in the lawsuit are incredibly more complex. And may be addressed in another explanatory article.

But for now, I strongly believe that most people’s goals and aspirations are the same as ours. We want the certification process to be better, stronger, forward thinking, open, transparent and to reflect the needs of professionals.

Our families deserve nothing else.

In the holiday movie classic, “It’s a Wonderful Life,” we are given glimpses into the life of a seemingly simple man, George Bailey. When we look closely at the George Bailey character, we see a man who is desperately trying to dictate his future and establish his own legacy. He is going to attend college, obtain his degree, then be instrumental in building big cities. He will turn his back on his bucolic little town, Bedford Falls and will be a world traveler. He will be wealthy … and he will be admired.

And yet, George Bailey failed at all of these goals and ambitions. He failed miserably. And yet, in that failure in that seething desperation, came triumph, came the richness of life, came the true legacy that life had in store for him.

Failure. Triumph. Legacy. Those concepts can provide joy. Or an improper or incorrect focus on them can provide tragedy.

Yesterday, on behalf of eating disorder professionals, I filed a lawsuit naming iaedp, Bonnie Harken and other individuals as defendants. It is a class action lawsuit alleging violations of the antitrust laws for the manner in which the iaedp certification program is operated. It also alleges violations of racketeering statutes.

Before filing this lawsuit, an honorable resolution was offered. A resolution which could have strengthened the local corporate chapters, which could have provided seed capital to those chapters, which would have empowered those chapters, and which would have brought greater collaboration amongst iaedp members and those chapters.

This offer did not receive the courtesy of a response.  Perhaps because the offer included a requirement that Ms. Harken would have to step down.

And so, we find ourselves in litigation. With possible investigations to be conducted by state agencies in the near future.

I shake my head wondering how this community got so far away from what it should be. How did the community become a war zone for tired, self-loathing, hurting people? Or people who parade their extremist political and social views in public at the expense of families and our loved ones who suffer from eating disorders. When did suffering families become secondary?

How did we get to a place where an individual’s hubris kidnaps their very identity, their very existence, and merges it with the organization they try to lead. Until that person believes they and the organization are one and the same. They lead through fear and intimidation. They trust no one.

And they fear.

They fear that they will be discovered.

What a burden that surely must be. Wondering every day whether today will be the day that questionable conduct could be exposed. And wondering still what else they, themselves missed and if that too will be exposed. To live with that uncertainty. With that fear.

As we age and we perceive the twilight of our existence is at hand, many of us concern ourselves about legacy. What ours may be. For that matter, will we even have a legacy to speak of?

How will we be remembered? Will we be remembered at all? Have we made a positive impact in this world? Is our world a better place when we depart than what it was when we came into this existence?

Questions which confound many. Questions which many people believe must be answered before they pass. By people who believe they can shape their own legacy. By people who do not understand that our legacies are dictated by the future. By the George Baileys of the world. They do not understand that they only need to be an authentic person. History will make its own judgments.

For some, a day of reckoning has arrived. Reckoning which may very well dictate legacies. Legacies of hope and triumph. Or legacies of despair.

Who are your heroes?

For that matter, what is a hero?

In our “Instant Gratification Internet Generation” society, the bar as to what constitutes a “hero” is set at a level lower than the lowest bar in a Limbo Dancing Contest.

So again, what constitutes a hero?

Many apply the word to their sports idols. Especially if that sports idol is seen in the presence of an incredibly average singer who has a brilliant PR and marketing department behind her. If you can score 40 points in a basketball game, or throw for 400 yards in a football game or be the winning pitcher for a ragtag baseball franchise as it wins its first “World Serious” championship, you are a hero.

Some perhaps more enlightened people look upon police officers, firefighters and military personnel as heroes. That certainly hits much closer to the mark. We admire people who place themselves in harm’s way for the sake and safety of others.

And then, there are true heroes.

Men and women who toil in anonymity, going about life with humility, being their authentic selves, unaware that their very existence brings inspiration and hope to others.

This past month, for four (4) days, I had the privilege of being in the presence of a “true hero.”

For about the last eighteen (18) months, my son Hanford and his wife, Rebeca had been planning a trip to Disney World in Orlando for the entire family. Make no mistake, I am more of a lounge on the beach in St. Maarten guy. But when family calls, you immediately answer the call.

One of the pieces of advice my son took to heart was, “With regard to marriage, always marry up! Never down … Always up.”

Rebeca is from a traditional Mexican family. She is the oldest of three children, all daughters.

Understanding that education is the silver bullet, being bilingual and pushing academic excellence was the standard in Rebeca’s family. This no doubt led to her being valedictorian of her high school class, scholarship offers from many universities and unsolicited requests to apply to Ivy League schools. She obtained her degree from Baylor University in four (4) years, followed by an MS degree and then obtained her CPA. Her work at Southwest Airlines is being recognized for its brilliance as she ascends the corporate ladder.

And all the while, she is an incredible wife and mother to one of my little “grandbabies with rabies,” Riley.

Her youngest sibling, Natalia lives in Waco with her husband, Hector. She is a Radiologic Technologist. I cannot think of a time when I have not seen Natalia with a smile on her face. She is a very involved aunt and when the time is right, will undoubtedly be an incredible mom.

The third sister, “Sally” is in her late 20s.  Like her sisters, she is bilingual, smart and so observant of life. She also has spina bifida. She is in a wheelchair. Despite the cruel obstacles and hardships life imposed upon her, more often than not, Sally wears a smile, laughs easily and just by looking at her Facebook page, is loved by so many.

Norma, the mother of these young women is obviously incredible. A quiet fighter in her own right. Just a few days before the wedding of Rebeca and my son, Norma’s mother passed away. She handled this tragedy with strength, with resolve … yes, with understandable sadness but with grace.

Those four days at Disney World were shared with Rebeca, her immediate family and extended family who resides in Monterrey, Mexico. We were surrounded by Disney created “heroes.” Star Wars heroes. Animated heroes. Children of all ages would point in wonder, would stare with a look of awe on their faces. These fictional characters brought such joy to their lives! And all the while, they were unaware of a true hero in their midst.

The father, the daddy, of Rebeca and her sisters, the husband of Norma is Rafael. Rafael is a welder by trade. Spanish is his primary language. Yes, he speaks more English than I speak Spanish, but he struggles with English and yet, no matter the difficulties, he conveys his message.

Those days in Disney, we walked an average of about 10 miles every day. Every step of the way, he was behind Sally in her chair, making sure that she too would experience the wonder and excitement we all felt. Helping her in and out of rides. Attentive to her every need. While at the same time, sharing his time and emotions with all of us.

Yes, late in the afternoons/early evenings, hunger or fatigue set in.  And yet, Rafe handled all difficulties, both perceived and real, with no complaints, no outward display of angst.

As our vacation trip continued, I saw this man’s demeanor remain constant and strong. Laughing with us, his eyes wide open, but always aware of his family, of Sally. And even though I intellectually knew this before, I saw in action over an extended period of time, the reality that this incredible man, this selfless man, always placed his family, the needs of his children first and foremost. Without complaint. I saw it was inherent in his nature. In his soul.

I knew I was in the presence of a true hero. And what a gift he had bestowed upon me.

On our last day, the last night, I was sitting next to him. Sally and her mom had gone for a “bio break.” And there we were. The reality of who he is overwhelmed me. I was intimidated by the grace of this man. I so wanted to tell him. And yet, the words would not come. I began to tear up. Could I convey to him the gift he had given to me and convey it in a way that he would understand how important it was to me? The words caught in my throat. And then, the moment was over as others joined us.

On our second day in the Magic Kingdom, the article on Terminal Anorexia was published in the Washington Post. It included some substantive quotes and information from me and included photos of my daughter and me. National news! From a news source with a significant following! Now this was going to be important! How wrong I was … how foolish.

As I saw Rafe every day continue to place the happiness and needs of his family over himself, I saw in action, that the measure of a person isn’t dictated by stories in a news source. It isn’t about your own accolades. It is about the selfless, every day works of a humble hero. From people who would never think about using the word “hero” to describe themselves.

Years ago at Thanksgiving, I started a tradition in my family where after we dine, we sit around the table and briefly say what we are thankful for. This year, for me, it will be easy. My eyes have been opened.

Rafe, you are my hero. You are the father, the daddy, the pappa, I aspire to be. Your quiet grace. Your dignity. Your humor. Your strength.

You are a hero.

“Ultimate excellence lies not in winning every battle, but in defeating the enemy without ever fighting.” ― Sun-Tzu, The Art of War

The Art of War was written in the 5^th Century B.C. by a legendary figure, General Sun Tzu. Composed during the tumultuous Warring States period of China, it was the first book of its kind, totally dedicated to the study of warfare.

In some business schools today, it is still required reading. That is because this scroll is not just a blueprint on tactics in warfare, but it speaks to leadership qualities and assessing strengths and weaknesses in organizations, businesses and people in general.

With regard to leadership qualities, authoritative English translations indicate one of Sun Tzu’s philosophies was:

There are five dangerous faults which may affect a general:

(1) Recklessness, which leads to destruction;

(2) cowardice, which leads to capture;

(3) a hasty temper, which can be provoked by insults;

(4) a delicacy of honor which is sensitive to shame;

(5) over-solicitude for his men, which exposes him to worry and trouble.

Even one of those qualities can be devastating not just for that leader but for her organization.  A combination of more than one of those qualities assures failure.

One of the most devastating flaws a “leader” can possess is equating themselves and the organization as being one and the same. This type of “leader” rules from a place of intimidation and fear. They trust no one. Suspicion and insecurity are the hallmarks of their decision making. Fact based, intelligent criticism of the organization is regarded as a personal slight and insult. That type of organization embraces the ego and selfishness and shrinks from humility and public service. The removal of that “leader” often results in the organization failing.

Which brings us to the international association of eating disorders professional foundation, inc. (“iaedp”) and its “leader” Bonnie Harken.

In late August, I reached out to Ms. Harken and iaedp setting forth troubling concerns about iaedp and the iaedp chapters. As part of that correspondence, I stated,

“In fact, I have been strongly encouraged to attempt resolution quietly and confidentially with you and iaedp. I have reached out in good faith.

I welcome an open discussion with you in which we attempt to correct any misconceptions and right all wrongs. I also believe this can best be accomplished by bringing in a few third parties to work together collaboratively.”

That discussion never happened.

I believe Ms. Harken stated that she, “would fight until the end!” I will always wonder if Ms. Harken ever asked the more important questions, “What is in the best interests of iaedp?” and “What is in the best interests of the families suffering from eating disorders?”

In the past two months, I attempted to keep the individual chapters apprised of the communications. I advised them how they could retain attorneys inexpensively. I sent information to them addressing the inconsistencies I had found. I stated that I was available for a discussion with them at any time. I stated that in my opinion, the individual chapters did not have liability and that I was not looking at them.

Now, some of the individual chapters are exploring dissolving. Some of the individual chapters, like the Orange County Chapter, the Los Angeles Chapter, the San Francisco Chapter, the SoCal Chapter cannot dissolve. This is because, according to the California Attorney General they are not properly registered in California and as such, are not authorized to conduct business in that State.

Those chapters’ board of directors was required to make sure all legal requirements were complied with when registering in California. They were not. Ms. Harken leads each of those boards of directors (as well as all other iaedp corporate chapters)

We made one last attempt at resolution before litigation being filed, including sending a copy of the complaint to Ms. Harken’s and iaedp’s attorneys. This communication was met with stony silence. The time for a response has lapsed. And so, to litigation we will proceed. As surely we must. As well as complaints to state and federal taxing authorities.

General Sun Tzu believed that when you have your foe surrounded and their defeat is inevitable, you should offer that foe an honorable exit.

In this matter, a road to redemption was offered. And was not accepted.

The consequences for that lack of vision will inevitably lead to a conclusion Ms. Harken and iaedp cannot or will not foresee.

More’s the pity.

My beloved daughter Morgan,

Another year upon us. The lighting of a commemoration candle at 11:31 tonight marking when you left us. Another reminder of you being gone.

Leaving a hole in the heart.  A part of our soul now missing. The knowledge that for those who loved you the most, for your mom and daddy, we will never be complete again. A part of us … perhaps the best part, has been unfairly taken from us.

As for us, what do we have left? Is there a path before us? How do we find it?  And then, how do we stay on it?

For the past seven years, I have tried to get out of my own way and let greater messages, messages I was never meant to understand at the time, simply flow through me. To embrace all the life lessons I had learned up to that point, and then to simply follow the messages and leaders that would be brought to me.

I know you want … you demand that I keep fighting. You never gave up. The Heart of a Lioness and the Soul of a Warrior. Even as your last breath left you. You called us “Twins.” And I know you demand that I never give up as well.

But the burden is so great, and it is singular.  Whatever path placed before me I walk alone. At my weakest moments, the reality of never being publicly supported by even one person, squeezes some of the humanity from me. And then I remember all the times you fought. Your pain. Your turmoil. Your demons. But then the people you helped, the lives you saved … “I can seem to help everyone else, I just can’t save myself.” A message that inspires me … and haunts me.

There is so much to do. So many families being hurt. So many loved ones in such pain … as you were. And so many who should be helping and yet, are wrestling with their own demons, their own inner turmoil, their own fear. Give me the wisdom and insight to always remember that and give them the grace and understanding they so richly deserve.

I know not where this path is taking me.  I do not control it. I know I do not have the luxury of leaving the path. Despite my many flaws, my weaknesses, I know I must carry on.  To carry this burden.

How many more souls will YOU save through the messaging that flows through me? How many more sons and daughters will be restored and will return to their families with their bodies, their minds, their souls recovered and now intact? Please always remind me it is never about me.  I do not save them. You do. Your messaging saves them.

I am so weary. This year … this time, feels especially painful. And I don’t know why. Perhaps I am not meant to understand that. I do know I can never let my ego believe that I see a path of light and righteousness that others should be taking. But that would just be a misguided ego. It is not about me or my perception. It never was. Help me always remember that.

In this arena of life, the battle is becoming much more intense and threatens to overwhelm. And when that moment hits in which I may finally be overcome, imbue others with your strength, your humor, your resolve so that they may carry on your incredible, indomitable fighting spirit.

I know I do not have the luxury of giving up. This path was set before me by fates I am not meant to understand. I do not have to like this path. That does not matter. What does matter is that I know I cannot leave this path. The lessons you taught me after you were taken mandate that I stay the course.

But I need you now more than ever. Bring wisdom. Bring humility. Bring faith. Bring love. Guide me. Do not let me falter.

I know I am weak. Without your spirit, I cannot continue. At 11:31 p.m. tonight, I will light a candle. I will cry. I will remember. But through those tears, through that one candle, through quiet reflection and sorrow, find a way to embrace me with your loving arms. Find a way to let me find more strength, more resolve, more wisdom and understanding so that together, you and I can continue to love and to help others.

A future for others awaits. Help me to understand, that when I am needed, I will answer the call and help others find that future.

And maybe then, maybe one day, I can rest.

One day.

Your loving Daddy

Death.

Transitioning.

Reincarnation.

Afterlife.

Nihilism.

Charon the Ferry Man.

Cicero writing in the “Dream of Scipio” describing an out of body experience of the soul traveling high above the Earth looking down on the small planet from far away.

The Halls of Valhalla.

Heaven, Hell and Limbo.

So many beliefs, so much conjecture. So much fear.

The great unknown.

All words and terms which describe an absolute certainty, a universal truth. Our existence as we know it, using whatever belief system you embrace, on this third rock from the sun is going to end . Our fragile bodily organs are going to cease. Finis.

The finality of our current existence evokes the greatest amount of fear in so many people. And I can’t help but wonder … why? Why do we fear that which we cannot alter? Why do we fear an event that will happen to us all? Do we fear our loss of this life? Or, on a much grander scale, do we fear the loss of our very existence? That intangible essence of a soulfulness which far transcends our knowledge. What do we fear?

Now certainly, I do not relish the thought of the various pains that often accompany death. But, when a person comes to grasp the reality that all death is certain, perhaps a small light of understanding enters our consciousness, a light that can grow in intensity. A light that can temper our fear of death.

For me, with regard to the specter of death, (using the parlance of our times), the end of October sucks mammoth monkey balls.

My daughter’s commemoration day is but 6 days away. But today for me, that must wait. Today is another black letter day.

Four years ago, on October 24, 2019, my dad was taken.

Cancer visited him for the last time during his 88^th rotation around the sun. The message of its inevitability registered even though his mind was fogged with pain medication.

At 12:54 p.m., Dallas time, my father breathed his last. Surrounded by all 5 children, their spouses, significant others. Surrounded by love. Once again, hearing those devastating words, “He’s gone.”

And yet, I needed a final, last life lesson taught by my dad. When given the news of cancer and its severity, my dad faced that news not with outward fear, pain and anger, but with grace. The last life lesson he taught me was to find and then embrace, the courage which exists within us all as we face our certain mortality. Believe in something greater than ourselves. Find the grace and courage within us.

My dad did not often show his emotions. At least, until the grandbabies came on to the scene.  He flew fighter jets, was transported in a mini submarine to inspect Russian radar facilities in the 1950s, played musical instruments, made a lot of money, lost it all, and loved his children.

And when faced with the greatest fear that most people encounter, his inner strength, his courage, was passed to us, to his children, so that we could continue our battles. And continue we do as we surely must.

It is almost too contrived to say, “thank you Dad, I love you.” But no other words suffice.

“Thank you Dad.”

“I love you.”

With regard to the eating disorder community, other than being located in the United States, what do the following 28 geographic areas have in common?

• San Francisco
• Southwest Washington
• South Carolina
• New Haven
• Miami
• Lubbock
• Kansas City
• The Heartland (Illinois)
• Richmond
• Dallas/Fort Worth
• Alabama
• Tampa
• Rhode Island
• North Carolina
• Atlanta
• Central Florida
• Willamette Valley
• Philadelphia
• Denver
• New York City
• Puget Sound
• South Florida
• Southern Florida
• Los Angeles
• Phoenix
• Central Coast California
• San Diego
• Orange County California

Each area contains an “independent” iaedp corporate chapter. Yet despite the broad geographic disbursement of those “independent” iaedp corporate chapters, each chapter was incorporated in the State of Illinois.

That is strange since the “national chapter,” iaedp Foundation, Inc. is organized in the State of California. So why were those twenty-eight (28) “independent” iaedp corporate chapters organized in the State of Illinois?

Bonnie Harken resides in Pekin, Illinois.

Incorporation in Illinois matters because that allows Ms. Harken, along with Dena Cabrera and Joel Jahraus (and Ralph Carson in all but 3 chapters), to act as the Board of Directors for all of these “independent” iaedp corporate chapters.

The importance of this fact cannot be underestimated. Ms. Harken sits on the Board of Directors of each and every “independent” iaedp corporate chapter incorporated in Illinois. And the Board of Directors is the real “power” behind any organization. Not the officers. Not employees. Not contractors.

Power and control reside within the Board of Directors. Illinois law succinctly states:

§ 108.05. Board of directors. (a) Each corporation shall have a board of directors, and except as provided in articles of incorporation, the affairs of the corporation shall be managed by or under the direction of the board of directors.

The reality is that the “independent” iaedp corporate chapters are anything BUT independent. Each corporate chapter is subservient to the whims, the wishes, the desires, the demands of Ms. Harken.

The Board of Directors (AKA Bonnie and her people) of each “independent” iaedp corporate chapter:

• Can hire/fire any officer;
• Can change the mission of each iaedp corporate chapter—even without the approval of the officers of that chapter;
• Have the exclusive right to file articles of dissolution (the document that disbands the chapter);
• Change the amount of revenue each chapter pays to the national foundation, and;
• Employ attorneys to defend the corporate chapter regarding any dispute … or refuse to retain and pay those attorneys.

If the “independent” iaedp corporate chapters need additional evidence that they are subservient to Ms. Harken and the national chapter, they only need to look at each chapter’s corporate filings with the Illinois Secretary of State. All contain the following language:

5.        Brief statement of the type of activity the corporation is conducting:

CONSISTENT WITH THE INTERNAL REVENUE CODE 501C6, THE CHAPTER IS EDUCATIONAL IN PURPOSE AND IS IN COOPERATION WITH THE INTERNATIONAL ASSOCIATION OF EATING DISORDERS PROFESSIONAL FOUNDATION, INC.

But WAIT!

Ms. Harken’s national foundation, iaedp Foundation, Inc. is a 501(c)(3) organization. However, it appears as if the “independent” iaedp corporate chapters are 501(c)(6) organizations.

In accordance with IRS rules and regulations, 501(c)(3) organization’s primary goal is charitable or educational. They must perform activities that benefit the public through services such as providing housing, food distribution, education, religion, or other publicly beneficial actions.

Contrarily, the IRS does not categorize 501(c)(6) organizations as charitable organizations. Instead, these organizations are formed to support their members’ business activities or association activities.

501(c)(3) nonprofits can receive tax-deductible donations. However, Ms. Harken’s national foundation, iaedp Foundation, Inc. largely does not solicit nor accept donations. Aren’t we justified in asking … why not?

The “independent” iaedp corporate chapters cannot solicit tax deductible donations and do not have a Board of Directors of their own choosing. Ms. Harken has invested herself with seemingly, unlimited control; if the chapters wanted to do something to enact positive change, they’d be limited by not only their filings but likely by Ms. Harken’s overlording.

Let’s review how she accomplished acquiring this power:

1).       Ms. Harken is the only full time, “officer/employee/contractor or indentured servant” of the national iaedp chapter;

2).      Ms. Harken ensures that the Board of Directors overseeing the national organization contains ZERO attorneys, ZERO persons with outside business experience and ZERO experience in other industries.

3).      As “managing director” of iaedp national, Ms. Harken has employed her son in whatever capacity she deems appropriate. Historically, that has included attempting to manage the website, the audio/visual aspects of the Symposium, and potentially any other employment she believes suits her family’s needs. Anti-nepotism rules in many organizations exist for legitimate reasons.;

4).      Ms. Harken refuses to provide documents and financial information that iaedp national, as a 501(c)(3) entity is required to disclose to any and all third parties, including the “independent” iaedp corporate chapters;

5).       Ms. Harken refuses to authorize and/or approve an independent audited, financial statement conducted by a reputable CPA firm and has so refused for in excess of ten (10) years (hmmm… what might she be trying to hide?);

6).      At 80 years old, Ms. Harken has not publicly announced any transition plan to allow the next generation of professionals to operate the national iaedp foundation. Because of her iron grip on iaedp national and the “independent” iaedp corporate chapters, this plan necessarily would need to be extensive and include changing the Board of Directors for each of the “independent” iaedp corporate chapters, reviewing all contracts, conducting due diligence on all past activities, and investigating for possible fraud;

7).       Ms. Harken refuses to pay to the California Labor Board state taxes, both past and current, for work and services performed for a California based organization and for work performed within the State of California. In all legal probability, this could expose herself, iaedp national and iaedp national’s Board of Directors for payment of taxes, penalties and interest;

8).      Ms. Harken dissolved her for profit corporation in 2016, and for every year thereafter, she made material misrepresentations to the general public on iaedp national’s Form 990 tax filing about the status of this corporation;

9).      Ms. Harken implemented an unlawful tying arrangement mandating iaedp national association membership and attendance at the national symposium in order to acquire and maintain board certification. She continues this practice even though she has actual knowledge of a federal court case in which an identical tying arrangement was thrown out;

10).    Ms. Harken’s iaedp’s national Board of Directors did not conduct a thorough investigation of Ms. Harken, did not place her on administrative leave and is allowing her to conduct business as usual despite iaedp’s attorneys admitting that mistakes and errors were made.

Each of these ten (10) items are irrefutable and/or are supported by documentation and administrative filings with state and federal agencies.

I cannot help but wonder how much of this important information has been conveyed by Ms. Harken to the “independent” iaedp corporate chapters. How much transparency has there been? Has Ms. Harken answered all of your questions to your satisfaction? Has Ms. Harken produced all of the documents and information you requested?

We can only speculate as to what will become of the “independent” iaedp corporate chapters as state and federal administrative investigations of Ms. Harken and the national iaedp chapter are conducted, especially as these issues with iaedp national are discovered.

In fact, there may be “independent” chapters who may wish to disband. If so, as officers in those chapters, you should know that legally you do not have the right nor authority to officially disband those chapters. Under Illinois law, a majority of the directors on your Board of Directors (meaning, Ms. Harken and her people) must approve and file articles of dissolution. But first, all chapter debts must be paid. Then, if there are any assets remaining, those assets must be conveyed to another non-profit organization and not insiders.

But please reconsider going in the direction of disbanding.

As stated before, the “independent” iaedp chapter corporations are 501(C)(6) organizations. Technically you are a business league or a trade association. Perhaps your interests may be best served by collaborating and operating as a trade association?

Various possibilities are allowed under the 501(C)(6) designation. For example, forming a National Alliance overseeing all “independent” iaedp chapter corporations? Creating a central repository containing research articles, items of varied and important interests and the latest in treatment regiments to be shared with pediatricians and other medical professionals who do not specialize in eating disorders.

Why should you not have a national listserv where you, as members, have 24/7 access to this listserv where you can ask questions and seek treatment experts in other parts of the nation? As providers who have been volunteering countless hours to the field, [and a very sincere, thank you for that] your passion for the field can continue to not only be utilized and valued, but exponentially grown.

As I hear about chapters wanting change and fearing the future, ideas have been shared. For example, potentially the financially stronger chapters could assist fledgling chapters. Ideas to generate revenue could be shared. Collaborating with other medical professionals on joint projects could be organized.

A national alliance of chapters could become stronger, more relevant and have access to very large libraries of research and understanding. By way of example, the universities in the Big 10 Conference have the Big 10 Academic Alliance. I am embedding information about this alliance:

https://btaa.org/%5BAS1%5D

If the primary mission of the “independent” iaedp corporate chapters is to reach out to treatment providers and educate them, imagine, for example, having access to treatment providers while they are in medical school and their residency programs… THAT could make for tremendous progress.

Why can’t your ideas and other far greater future progress which is generated by chapter members be explored, fought for, pursued and then achieved? What is stopping this type of progress? Your future awaits. A bold future. A bright future. Despite what you may have heard about me, I certainly am excited about that type of future. [And no, I do not have cloven hooves nor horns, nor a pointy tail… most of the time!]

I understand that I can come off as intimidating, as a force, as a person to be feared. Almost 40 years of fighting in courtrooms across this nation can leave that impression. However, for most of my life you could measure the depth of my soul by the thimbleful.

I am still a man of many character flaws. However, when the most precious life you have ever embraced is extinguished, the person you may have been dies with your loved one. A person can only hope that if and when your soul finds you and its purpose is made clear, you have the fortitude, wisdom and humility to stay on that path.

And so, for those who would trust in themselves and find a way to trust me, you will find no more loyal friend than me. I can assure you that if you have concerns and contact me, I will embrace you as a fellow soul, a person, a unique individual who deserves and will receive a respectful, civil conversation. Trust in your courage. Leave any fear behind.

The future awaits you, awaits our children, awaits progress and brighter tomorrows. And we must be bold in facing down impediments and obstacles wherever, or whoever they may be.

And so, the last question I have for you is … how much longer are we going to let any impediment deter us from accomplishing our truest mission?

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According to iaedp’s records, it has ZERO full time employees.

According to iaedp’s records, it has ZERO paid employees.

According to iaedp’s records, no officer, employee or director has any reportable compensation from iaedp.

Consider those facts.

ZERO full time employees.

ZERO paid employees.

ZERO reportable compensation for any officer, employee or director.

Since those facts come from iaedp’s own Form 990 tax forms, we can assume they are accurate. If those fact are accurate, iaedp could have many tax issues and quite frankly, does not even need a Board of Directors.

This is because a Board of Directors can only oversee the operations of an organization which has actual employees. Independent contractors must be completely free from control of the organization for which they provide their services or they cease to be independent contractors.

Iaedp is a 501(c)(3) organization with ZERO paid employees and yet generates revenue exceeding $1,000,000 annually. An organization with ZERO paid employees and yet, is charged with operating and overseeing a Board Certification program for the care and treatment of eating disorders. A Board Certification program ostensibly not subject to the whims and direction of a Board of Directors since iaedp’s “managing director,” as an independent contractor can do whatever she pleases with no direction and no oversight.

So, let us explore how iaedp and Ms. Harken performed these feats of “Keyser Sose like” prestidigitation.

The Devil’s in the Details (or Documents)

On iaedp’s Form 990 tax returns, its “managing director” Bonnie Harken, declares under penalties of perjury, that her “management company,” Crossroads Programs, Inc. is managing iaedp and that it is an independent contractor instead of employee.

To this we can safely say:

The records from the Illinois Secretary of State indicate Crossroads Programs, Inc. dissolved on June 10, 2016. Crossroads has not been in existence since that date.

When confronted with this reality, Ms. Harken through her attorneys admitted this information submitted on its Form 990 was wrong. They stated that Ms. Harken was operating through her “sole proprietorship” presumably with the same name. A sole proprietorship is merely a person doing business under an assumed name. It may have a separate tax ID number. But the individual and the sole proprietorship are the same, they are one.

We can only wonder how long Ms. Harken’s misrepresentation regarding her corporate status would have continued if not brought to their attention. We do know that corporate misrepresentation appears on at least five (5) of iaedp’s Form 990 last tax filings.

We can certainly understand and sympathize if this matter is overlooked for one year. But FIVE years? That is not a mistake. That is intentional. And it is deceptive.

Independent Contractor or Employee … Is there really a difference?

If we review Ms. Harken’s statement made under penalties of perjury that she is an independent contractor of iaedp and not an employee, we are justified in asking is that too another falsehood? For if she is an employee, the ramifications for Ms. Harken and iaedp could be quite draconian.

Since iaedp is a California organization, we must look to California law to determine if Ms. Harken is an independent contractor, as she represents to the IRS, the California Labor and Workforce Development Agency and the general public or is in fact, an employee.

The facts, and common sense do not support Ms. Harken’s sworn statement that she is an independent contractor.

The State of California utilizes the “ABC test” to determine if workers are employees or independent contractors.

California law presumes that a worker is an employee and not an independent contractor. The employer (in this case, iaedp) has the burden to prove a worker is in fact, an independent contractor.

Under the ABC test, a worker is considered an employee and not an independent contractor, unless the employer satisfies all three of the following conditions:

• The worker is free from the control and direction of the hiring entity in connection with the performance of the work, both under the contract for the performance of the work and in fact;
• The worker performs work that is outside the usual course of the hiring entity’s business; and
• The worker is customarily engaged in an independently established trade, occupation, or business of the same nature as that involved in the work performed.

Iaedp cannot satisfy even one of these criteria.

Ms. Harken, is purportedly working 40 hours a week, has employed her son and pays him approximately $76,ooo annually. They are allegedly providing work and services clearly within the usual course of business of iaedp corporate chapters and other eating disorder organizations.

She organizes iaedp’s annual symposium and oversees all aspects of the manner in which iaedp conducts business. She can run iaedp with an iron fist without any oversight or control.  And she does. Within the context of iaedp, Ms. Harken has “unlimited power.” How likely is unlimited power likely to be ceded by an organization to an independent contractor? Someone over whom you have no control. Unlimited power!

Ms. Harken, her dissolved corporation and d/b/a/ a sole proprietorship cannot show under any circumstances that she was performing work outside the usual course of business of an eating disorder organization. To the contrary.

The facts show that on iaedp’s tax forms, Ms. Harken misrepresented Crossroad’s status, misrepresented its existence, misrepresented that she was not an employee and illegally operated in the State of California.

In Ms. Harken’s defense, we must raise the question, “If Ms. Harken is a resident of the State of Illinois, would she be subject to California taxation law as either an employee or independent contractor?” The answer is yes.

California companies have to withhold state income taxes for resident employees wherever they perform their services, and generally for nonresident employees for services performed in-state. But this is not the case for nonresident employees who perform all their services outside of California.

This provision does not apply to Ms. Harken since she performs some of her services within the State of California. We know this for a fact because the iaedp annual symposium is hosted every other year in Palm Springs, California.

But let’s give Ms. Harken the benefit of the doubt and assume, for some reason known only to God and broccoli, all state and federal agencies determine that Ms. Harken is in fact, an independent contractor. The result would still be the same.

Specifically, the issue is not where the independent contractor performed the services, but in what state the benefit was received. Accordingly, even if nonresident independent contractors never set foot in California, if they perform services for a California-based customer, they have an economic nexus with the state and are likely doing business in California for income tax purposes.

We know for a fact that Ms. Harken has set foot in California at least during those years in which the symposium is conducted in Palm Springs. Presumably the California iaedp corporate chapters pay the national chapter certain revenue.

In iaedp’s tax filing in California it reports that iaedp has no paid employees and has not withheld any state income taxes. That is a significant problem.

California requires employers to withhold state income tax from wages paid to employees. There are also three other state payroll taxes: State disability insurance, which are withheld from employees’ wages; Unemployment insurance, which the employer pays; and Employment training tax, which the employer also pays. Iaedp did not do this.

California has a reputation of strictly enforcing withholding requirements. Failure to comply may result in penalties against the organization, its directors, and employees. The penalty is generally equal to the tax evaded or not collected.

Senator Dave Cortese (D-San Jose), Chair of the Senate Labor, Public Employment and Retirement Committee stated, “An independent contractor is a specific designation for self-employed people or businesses engaged in contract work. It’s not a gimmick for organizations to avoid paying for employee healthcare and other benefits or reducing their tax liability. Any company found breaking the law will be brought to justice, and they would certainly have no business advising other companies on labor law.”

Iaedp (or Ms. Harken since they are one and the same) employed a dissolved corporation as an independent contractor as its managing director. This resulted in iaedp having ZERO full time employees.  These facts are not in dispute.

And yet, that alleged independent contractor (Ms. Harken) is performing all the work for iaedp. If allowed, that would result in a Board of Directors having no power or authority over the only person acting as a full-time employee. Further, to whom does this independent contractor, this dissolved corporation or sole proprietor or individual report?

As egregious as Ms. Harken’s conduct, conduct which has a possibility of significant tax penalties being assessed against iaedp and Ms. Harken, as investigations conducted by the California Labor Board, the IRS and other entities will inevitably ramp up (followed closely by litigation), legal and financial exposure for third parties is also likely to be explored by federal and state agencies.

But it could be far worse. And it is.

In the next article, we shall discuss how Ms. Harken, and iaedp’s current president, Charlynn Smith may have exposed iaedp’s Board of Directors to significant financial liability.

Board certification programs requiring membership in the sponsoring association as a prerequisite to obtaining certification may be challenged as an illegal “tying” arrangement, among other antitrust theories.

Certification programs that are anticompetitive, discriminatory, unrelated to objective standards, or implemented without fair procedures are most likely to attract antitrust challenges. Moreover, certification programs that charge an unreasonably high price to apply for or receive certification or recertification similarly are subject to and likely to attract antitrust challenge.

Whereas, certifying bodies generally have broad discretion in setting and implementing certification requirements, courts will intervene when standards are not objectively established nor substantively justifiable. 

Which brings us to Bonnie Harken and iaedp.

In layman’s terms, an illegal tying arrangement arises when a seller [iaedp] possesses market power over the tying product [Board Certification] and exploits that power to force a buyer [eating disorder professionals] to purchase a distinct tied product [membership in iaedp and attendance at a symposium] that the buyer [eating disorder professionals] could have purchased elsewhere.

And for iaedp, that is a problem … a massive problem.

One of the reasons that tying arrangement are problematic is because the seller [iaedp] has a monopoly over the first item, [Board Certification]. So buyers [eating disorder professionals] are, in many instances, stuck with that seller for that item. And if they can only obtain the monopolized item [Board Certification] by purchasing the second item, [membership and attendance at a symposium] they are coerced into purchasing the second item from the tying seller [iaedp].

Iaedp’s precarious situation is illustrated in the recent case entitled Talone, et. al. v. The American Osteopathic Association, Case No. 1:16-cv-04644 (D. N.J. Jun. 12, 2017).

A group of osteopathic doctors sought class certification in the Talone suit which was filed in a federal court in New Jersey in August 2016. The defendant was the primary certifying body for osteopathic physicians in the United States, the American Osteopathic Association (“AOA”). The AOA is the only accrediting agency for osteopathic graduate medical education. A further component of practicing medicine is board certification to signify a particular specialty. The AOA offers board certification for osteopathic medicine. The American Board of Medical Specialties (“ABMS”) also offers board certification, but osteopathic physicians who complete their residencies at AOA accredited programs—the only accredited osteopathic programs—are not eligible for ABMS board certification. AOA board certification typically costs in excess of $1000 for the examination and administrative fees, plus annual board certification maintenance.

The Plaintiffs’ case targeted the fact that starting in 2012, in addition to the annual board certification maintenance fee, the AOA required all AOA board certified physicians to purchase and maintain annual membership in the AOA—or risk cancellation of their certification. The same requirements imposed by iaedp.

After the defendant’s motion to dismiss the case was denied, the parties reached a class settlement agreement. The agreement included:

1. A mutual non-disparagement clause and non-retaliation clause;
2. The AOA had to pay for sending notices to class members;
3. Certification was decoupled (stripped) from association membership;
4. Board Certification maintenance fee was terminated;
5. AOA was required to reduce dues by $90 for 2 years and dues were capped for another 2 years;
6. AOA had to pay $2 million for awareness campaign;
7. An independent task force was established to oversee the programs;
8. AOA had to pay attorney’s fees of $2,617,000;
9. Incentive awards for Class Representative of at least $15,000 were approved.

The plaintiffs’ attorneys estimated that benefits paid to class members by AOA would eventually exceed $35,000,000.

Iaedp’s situation is more egregious.  In the Talone case, there was an alternative certifying organization. Iaedp has a 100% monopoly. In the Talone case, the defendant did not require attendance at an annual symposium once every four years.

Mandatory attendance at Ms. Harken’s symposium does not further the goals of Board Certification. Let’s call it for what it is … a money grab.

On iaedp’s latest Form 990 (for 2021), it reported the symposium brought in $580,157.00.

The year before (2020), the symposium revenue was reported as $545,192.00.

The year before (2019), the symposium revenue was reported as $464,582.00.

It’s a good gig if you can get it.

Unless iaedp leadership makes extreme changes, changes which are in the best interest of the community, class action litigation against iaedp in the near future is a virtual certainty. If the court in the expected iaedp class action litigation follows the precedent set by the court in Talone, as part of the remedies the court will strip away certification from iaedp.

Certification for the care and treatment of eating disorders is important. That is why it cannot be left to people who are controlled by their own fear, self-interest and anger.

Indeed, if Board Certification is stripped away by a court, the only thing left for iaedp at that point may onlhy be the be numerous questions asked by the Attorney Generals of the States of Illinois and California … and the IRS.

In our next part, we will go into the possible tax consequences that iaedp, Ms. Harken and unfortunately, perhaps its Board of Directors may be facing… as well as all iaedp members who paid their fees and dues and then reported those fees and dues as a charitable deduction on their own tax returns.